After Thought Read online

  She turned to face him, nodding slowly and looking at him suspiciously.

  “Well, now I know about RTP,” he continued. “I’m no longer innocent. And you don’t know for sure that they don’t already know about us. So if you leave me now with the knowledge of RTP but without training me on how to use it, you are essentially leaving me defenseless.”

  She started to say something in protest but quickly closed her mouth, realizing he had found the loophole. Her eyes narrowed.

  “You can’t leave me defenseless, Maddie,” he said matter-of-factly. “That would definitely not be the right thing to do. I know too much now. Now you have to teach me to use Refined Transcendent Power. I know I can learn it. And then we can be together.”

  She stared at him for a long moment and softly said, “What if you are like James and you never fully master RTP? What if I have to watch you grow old and die while I remain eternally youthful? I don’t think I can go through that again.”

  “At least give me a chance,” he said. “Give me a couple of years. If I don’t master RTP within two years, you can walk away. But at least give me the chance. Teach me. I know I can do it. I won’t be like James. I promise I won’t let you down.

  “I should have a choice in this matter. I was in pure hell when you left me. I don’t think I can handle it if you leave me again. This is our second chance. I would rather risk dying so that I can be with you than to live without you. Without you, my life is meaningless. I’m begging you to teach me about RTP.”

  Adam could tell by the look on Maddie’s face that she was unsure. She said, “Let’s just suppose I decide to stay. If the KTP was on my trail, I have probably thrown them off by coming back. I don’t normally return to a place after I have left it. It’s not my pattern.”

  She was considering it. She didn’t flat-out say no. His hopes lifted ever so slightly. He nodded encouragingly and said, “Yes, that should buy us some time. Right?”

  “Possibly. But even if it buys us a month or two, or even six months, what happens if they find me and I have to leave? That would be even worse than if we part ways now.”

  “Simple,” he said. “I would go with you.”

  Her eyes grew wide and she said, “Think about what you’re saying. Are you willing to just give up everything in your life to leave with me—your band, your friends, and your life as you know it?”

  “Absolutely,” he said without hesitation. “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. Before I met you, I thought I wanted fortune and fame and the rock star life. I thought I wanted to go on tour, get a recording contract, and live that life for as long as possible. But now I know none of that matters if I don’t have you in my life.”

  Still incredulous she said, “You’re willing to leave Zach, Claire, and the band and uproot your life to go into hiding and follow me around the country? You’re willing to take the chance that you might have to watch your back every day of your life because somebody might be trying to kill you?”

  Adam looked her dead in the eyes and said with conviction, “Yes. That’s what I want. I want you to stay and I want you to teach me RTP. If Paul finds you and you have to leave, then I want to go with you. You said you couldn’t live with yourself if something happened to me. Well, how will you feel if you leave me defenseless now and the KTP finds me and something bad happens to me?”

  He could tell she had no counter-argument. She narrowed her eyes and said, “That’s not fair.”

  “All is fair in love and war, darling.”

  Before she could respond, he leaned over and kissed her. This time she didn’t resist. He wanted her to feel the passion and love between them. He kissed her as if this was going to be their last kiss—so tenderly, so passionately. She responded with the same tenderness and passion.

  Adam knew she could still get up and walk out the door at any moment. And he would never try to force her to stay. If she stayed, it would have to be of her own free will. He could talk tough and act like he wasn’t going to let her go. But if that’s what she truly wanted, he would let her go. He would be miserable and crushed, but he would not try to stop her. He would never try to force her to do anything against her will. All he truly wanted was for her to be happy.

  They kissed for a long while. The months of separation made it even sweeter than Adam had remembered. Their hands and tongues explored each other in a familiar way. She wasn’t stopping him, and this encouraged him. He decided to take a chance. He figured that it was now or never. He wanted to show her how much he loved her.

  Adam stood, took Maddie by the hand, and gently pulled her to her feet. He took her by the hand and led her to the bedroom. As he turned to face her, he pulled her close to him, pressing her body against his. She put her arms around his neck and leaned farther into the embrace. He kissed her even more passionately as his hands began to caress her face, her neck, her back, and her breasts. She ran her fingernails up his back and through his hair, igniting the passion between them.

  Adam pulled back and took his shirt off. Her eyes admiringly scanned his body as she ran her hands up his sculpted abs and chest.

  He moved toward her, pulled her shirt over her head, and tossed it on the floor. Her chest rose and fell from her rapid breathing. He unfastened her bra, gently slid the straps off her shoulders, and let it drop to the floor. He cupped her large, soft breasts in his hands and leaned down to kiss them. She moaned softly as he slowly circled her nipples with his tongue.

  She unfastened his pants as he helped her pull them down so he could step out of them. Then he helped her do the same. Her unclothed body was even more beautiful than he had imagined. He wanted her more than ever, and he knew he was going to have her.

  She was willingly giving herself to him. He hoped this was her way of confirming that she was planning to stay and teach him RTP, and never leave him again.

  Adam gently laid Maddie on the bed as he kissed her neck, her chest, her breasts, her stomach, her thighs, until his tongue found her sweet spot. He heard her moan as he tasted her, his tongue circling and circling, her hips gently rocking to the rhythm. He cupped her breasts in his hands as she ran her fingers up his arms and through his hair, her moans steadily growing in intensity until, panting, she finally begged, “Take me now, Adam.”

  Unable to hold back his desire for her any longer, he slid into her as he took her hands in his and parted her lips with his tongue, an involuntary moan escaping his own lips as their bodies joined together, rocking in the fevered rhythm of lovemaking. In ecstasy, they became one as the pleasure surrounded them, enveloped them, united them as they simultaneously reached climax, both crying out in uninhibited abandon.

  They made love several more times that night, falling asleep for short periods of time in between. They couldn’t get enough of each other. Afterward, they lay spent in each other’s arms, Adam on his back with Maddie’s head resting on his shoulder while she slept. Although he was physically exhausted, Adam lay awake. He guessed it must be around three o’clock in the morning, but he willed himself to stay awake, partly because he loved holding her and wanted to savor the moment, and partly because he was afraid that if he fell asleep and let go of her, she would sneak out while he slept.

  Even though he had no idea what he was doing, he tried to use RTP by thinking positive thoughts about her staying with him. He visualized the two of them having happy times together in the future. Eventually, he couldn’t keep his eyes open any longer. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, so that he might feel it if she tried to sneak out, and drifted off to sleep.

  He slept fitfully. He kept waking up in a sweat from wild dreams—all about him being lost and lonely in one way or another—only to find her sleeping soundly beside him. Each time he awoke and she was still there, he breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe things would work out between them after all. He could only hope.

  Chapter 28

&nbs
p; Adam bolted upright in bed, panicked and angry at himself for falling asleep. He was immediately relieved to see that Maddie was still there, looking surprised by his sudden movement. She rolled over, smiled at him with her beautiful smile, kissed him, and said, “Good morning, sexy.”

  Those three little words were all it took to arouse him again. He pulled her close to him, and they made love again. Afterward, he held her tightly. He was hoping she had made up her mind to stay and teach him how to use RTP, but he didn’t dare to ask her at that moment. He didn’t want to push her too hard. He was hoping her actions were speaking louder than words, and that the mere fact that she was still there meant she intended to stay. Seeing the light streaming in through the shutters, Adam said, “What time is it?”

  Maddie rolled over, looked at her phone, and said, “Would you believe it’s almost noon?”

  As he leaned over to kiss her again, his stomach growled rather loudly. She giggled and said, “I’m hungry too. Let’s see if there’s anything edible left in my apartment.”

  They rummaged through her kitchen but since she had been gone so long, the food offering was scarce. They managed to find some frozen dinners that weren’t expired and decided to make a meal out of those.

  He didn’t want to leave Maddie’s side, but he knew it was Saturday and Night Fury had a gig that night. Eventually, he would have to leave to get ready. And he would have to ask her the question he had been avoiding: Are you planning to stay?

  They watched TV while they ate and talked about the good times they had together before she left. Adam kept an eye on the time, and debated whether or not he should even go to the gig. He knew that it wouldn’t be right for him to skip out on his friends. He also knew he wasn’t going to be able to stay with Maddie every second of every day. Eventually, he would have to trust her.

  When he couldn’t prolong the inevitable any longer, he said, “I have to go get showered and ready for the gig tonight. Are you planning to come with me?”

  He held his breath and braced himself for her answer. He expected the worst. But she didn’t hesitate when she said, “Sure. I’d love to.”

  “Really? You’re sure?”

  She smiled and nodded. Adam knew it was Maddie’s choice to stay or leave. He was going to have to learn to trust her and be willing to let her go if she chose to, and he would have to start soon. So after they finished eating, he kissed her and reluctantly said, “I guess I better go get ready.”

  “Yeah, I need to get ready too,” she said. “What time are we leaving?”

  “I’ll be back at seven-thirty to get you,” he said.

  “I’ll be ready.”

  He tried to smile a genuine smile, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. He hoped she couldn’t detect his anxiety. If she did, she didn’t let on. And even though they were neighbors, when Adam walked out of her door, fearing he would never see her again, he forced himself to go anyway.

  Chapter 29

  It took all of Adam’s willpower to stop himself from calling Maddie or knocking on her door every five minutes. He had told her he would be back to get her at about seven-thirty, but somehow he managed to get ready a lot faster and found himself pacing the floor, waiting for the time to pass.

  What seemed like an eternity later, he grabbed his guitar and amp and knocked on her door at precisely seven-thirty. He counted to thirty slowly. She didn’t answer. He tried the doorknob. It was locked. He felt his heart start to beat a little faster.

  He needed to get a grip—she always kept her door locked.

  He pressed his ear to the door, listening for any sounds or movements. Nothing. He stood back and rubbed his sweaty palms on his pants.

  Maybe she hadn’t heard him knocking.

  He knocked really loudly and listened again. A few seconds later he heard footsteps approaching the door. He closed his eyes and breathed a sigh of relief.

  When she opened the door, he hastily took her in his arms and hugged her tightly. She was still here.

  When he finally released her, she looked at him curiously as she searched his eyes. He knew she could sense his apprehension, but certainly she had to understand. He hoped she would be patient with him for a while until he calmed down some and quit acting like such a clingy freak. Who could blame him?

  He took a moment to check her out. She was wearing tight skinny jeans with rips in the knees, a t-shirt with a plunging neckline, a denim jacket, and black, high-heeled boots.

  “You look beautiful.”

  “Thank you,” she beamed. “You’re looking pretty good yourself.”

  He kissed her firmly on the lips. He thought about scooping her up in his arms, carrying her back to bed, and making love to her for the rest of the night. But he was reliable, if anything, and he wouldn’t leave the band hanging. So instead, he kissed her gently one more time and took her arm in his to escort her to his truck.

  Adam opened the passenger door for Maddie and then began to load his guitar and amp in the back of the truck. As he did, he had a realization. He had been so caught up in the events of Maddie’s return that he hadn’t had time to think about what would happen if he showed up with her at the gig with no warning or explanation.

  It suddenly occurred to him that Zach, Claire, and rest of the band might not be so happy to see her. Zach and Claire were very angry at Maddie for what she had done to him. In fact, Adam thought Zach might even hate her. He had said some really nasty things about her, his way of showing his support for Adam. Adam knew that Zach meant well. He had his back. Zach couldn’t understand how anyone could do that to someone they supposedly loved, especially when the victim was his best friend.

  Adam also realized there was no way he could tell them the truth about why Maddie had left and how they had reunited. His friends would think Adam had lost his freakin’ mind. How could he expect them to understand and believe Maddie’s story when he wasn’t sure he understood or believed it himself?

  He knew that when he walked in the door with Maddie that night it was going to be a shock to all of them. He worried that they might tell her off. And he also knew they were going to think he was an idiot for taking her back. He didn’t care about that, but he didn’t want to alienate his friends.

  Adam got in the driver’s side of the truck. Maddie was sitting in the middle, right next to him, like she had always done in the past. She put her head on his shoulder and held his free hand as they headed for the nightclub.

  After a few moments of silence Adam said, “You do realize that Zach and Claire and the guys are pretty angry about you leaving me?”

  Without hesitation she said, “I imagined they would be. I don’t blame them. I know they really care about you. They also don’t understand.”

  “No shit,” he said. “That might just be the understatement of the year.”

  Realizing his words sounded harsh, he laughed to try lightening the mood. She didn’t laugh.

  “They could never understand what has transpired between us,” he said. “I’ll never be able to explain it to them—at least not anytime soon.”

  She nodded somberly. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I don’t have to go if you don’t want me to.”

  “I’m not asking for an apology, Maddie,” he said gently. “I absolutely want you to go. I have already forgiven you. I just want you to be prepared and know they might not welcome you with open arms.”

  She winced and said, “I wouldn’t expect any less. I know they will think I deserve it. They care about you. They’re angry that I hurt you. I get it. I’m angry at myself for hurting you, but I truly believed I was doing the right thing. They don’t know the truth, and they never will. I can handle it.”

  Adam began to think that maybe it was a bad idea to take her so soon. He should have eased everyone into her reappearance over time. It might have been better if they had more time to come up with a belie
vable story about her return, but he didn’t voice that opinion. They were already en route and he didn’t want to let her out of his sight—not yet, anyway. Eventually, he would have to come clean with Zach and Claire and the rest of the band about being back together with Maddie anyway. They wouldn’t be able to hide it for long.

  And yet, if he were to be totally honest with himself, he was still a little hurt and wanted her to feel some discomfort for hurting him—just a little bit. He would’ve never admitted it to anyone, but a small part of him thought she should face the consequences of what she had done. He knew it was mean-spirited. But why should he be the only one who had suffered? Even though he knew that it must have been very hard for her to leave and he understood now why she had done it, he wanted to drive his point home to her that leaving him was the wrong decision. So he reasoned that now was as good a time as any to break the news that they were back together.

  Adam said, “We’ve got to come up with a story about where you’ve been and why you’re back.”

  “Well, as you know, I’ve gotten pretty good about making up stories about my life and hiding the truth. Let me think.”

  Wincing, Adam said, “Well I may have made matters worse when I told them that you broke up with me because you had to leave for a job assignment and you didn’t know how long you would be gone.”

  “Really?! A job assignment?” Maddie said incredulously. “They think I broke up with you and left you in the hospital because I had a job assignment? Wow. That really makes me look like the girlfriend of the year.”

  “I was a mess,” he said quietly. “They put me on the spot, and I couldn’t think quickly enough. It was the best I could come up with under the circumstances since I had no idea why you really left.”

  Now it was Maddie’s turn to wince. She paused, squeezed his hand, and said, “Okay, so we can say that I was really traumatized after the accident and I couldn’t stand to see you in pain. And then I found out that a close relative with cancer was given only a couple of months to live and was being put in hospice care, and my family needed my help. So, with all of the stress and being torn between staying with you and helping my family, I freaked out and made up the story about having writing assignment because I needed to escape reality. The first part wouldn’t be a lie.” She kissed his cheek and squeezed his hand tighter.